Cocktoberfest!

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How often can you find  place that has exactly what you want, is fast, and offers healthy options. Not many places do, but Poquito Mas does. Right after my write up about Carls Jr. I had been getting a lot of shit over reviewing a fast food place expecting good results. I was told, “What can you expect from fast food? It will always be horrible!” I felt challenged! Thank you Tyler, for getting in my head. I could not stop thinking about this. I am very impatient, and if I have to wait longer than 5 minutes for food (even at a nice restaurant) I tend to get a little pissy!

Last Friday I was tired, the girlfriend was tired. I didn’t know how I was going to survive one more crap-infested meal. She was very insistent on having tortilla soup. I thought and thought and remembered the Poquito Mas on Sunset Blvd. Perfect. We headed out, drove up, and parked. Luckily with all the action on sunset there was barley anyone there. More guys started to filer in almost to the point that it was getting a little sausage festy. Not being able to make up my mind these days I ask the typical “What’s your best seller?” question and of course I get the usual lets point to the most expensive seafood thing on the menu. I said, “No, what are guys known for?” he said, “Ohh… the burritos!” “Chicken burrito Please!” The girlfriend got the chicken tacos and the sought after  tortilla soup.

Many of these “Made to Order” Mexican places that have their lovely salsa cart. It is screaming at you when you walk in the door. Like… “Look at what we've got… and its FREE!” Well at least that’s what they make you think. You have to work for it. Now before I completely go off. This is not the only place that has one of these carts, Baja Freash, El Pollo Loco, etc. Some how they have all gotten together and decided:

“Hey lets fuck with our American customers. We will offer free salsa but we will give them a one inch deep cup to put it in." "We will let them have as many as they want, but by the 3rd one they will probably be to tired to get anymore.” Is this starting to sound familiar? “If they ask for a big bowl to put it in we’ll charge them for it.” “After all why would American’s pay for something that they can get for free (Think bottled water, its genius)?” And here is the best part “If we are not laughing by the time they have filled 20 little cups, we will be on the floor when they try to dip the three inch chip in to the one inch cup.”

Seriously by the 3rd fucking chip I wanted to push over the salsa cart! Come on people I know I am not the only one who feels this way. This needs to change. If we can evolve to checking email on iPads, then we can evolve in to 3 inch cups. I am tired of being laughed at! Always being that stupid white guy who sits in the corner trying to eat out of the Mexican laughing cups.  This if my final warning to you companies…

If you don’t make these cups bigger you’ll find my ass double dipping right at your super awesome salsa carts! I urge every single one of you to do this and send me a photo. These corporation’s need to know that their unsustainable way of saving money isn’t just bad for our planet its an insult to their customers.

By this point it seemed like the amount of sausage inside tripled, it had now grown into Cocktoberfest!

So… our food… Was here in 3 minutes. So at least they have this working for them. Everything looks ready for consumption. I take a bite, its great. All of the flavors melting together nicely in my mouth. 4 to 5 bites in and oil or butter is pouring out of my burrito. Just like I stabbed it with a knife. It went from thoughts of being healthy sounds of myself getting fatter. My lady friends tacos were a delight and the tortilla soup a perfect blend of seasoning and vegetables… Yucky, but it was good.

I don’t understand the point of putting so much oil or grease on food. It always ruins a good meal and happens more often then I would like. Aside from this experience I can usually say that Poquito Mas generally has great food, but if it is not fast food and it is not a restaurant, than what is it?

The food is completely consumed and at this point I am totally over whelmed by Cocktoberfest 2011.On the way out a female finally entered deferring some of the “eyeball man hunting” raining down on my girlfriend (she’s pretty hot and I’m very proud).

In the 3 minutes it took to get our food I was brought back to Tyler’s comments. The food was quick, for the most part good, and they had healthy options on the menu. To me this was fast food. When I shared my little triumph with my neighbor Katie she explained that what I ordered was not fast food merely food “Made to Order”. She was right and had a very valid point.

So in my half win, half fail. I felt I had addressed both issues. Unfortunately I did not truly take on Tylers challenge. I am realizing that like them, I too have my own opinion. Fast food to me is anything under 5 minutes, starting the second I walk in the door or pull up to the drive thru.

Poquito Mas was under 5 minutes, had healthy options on the menu, and no waiting. In the end it is a hybrid of food styles and from this day forward it shall be called a HYBRO! So MEAT ME… or say something in the comments section???

You can find out more about Poquito Mas @
http://www.poquitomas.com/

Get Heard!
Sean Rice aka MEAT ME

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Im too SEXY for ME MEAT!

That is exactly what it feels like when you eat really tasty food. Especially at ¡Lotería! Grill. You feel sexy. You are taking the time to enjoy and savor every. Single. Bite.  You feel like the entire restaurant is focused on you. Some are even shocked and awed.  You are almost nervous that everyone is going to approach you at any moment and ask you for some – almost as if they find you completely irresistible. But none of this is gonna happen if you can’t find fucking parking! My GOD!

Seriously, I don’t know, may be its me. It took me 20 to 30 minutes to finally give up and have the over priced, eight dollar valet guy park my car. I am on Hollywood Blvd. and there is no parking on either side of the street from 6pm to 6am, go figure. There is a parking structure on N. Cherokee Ave. but I think its $10 (I am not 100% sure).

I intended on being there at 10pm but by the time I was in the door it was about 10:23pm after pictures of course.  Going late to a restaurant does have its benefits. I walk in, there are just a few tables seated. The manager was quick to greet and seat. He says, “Where ever you want and I’ll follow.” How do you like them apples Rosa Mexicana!

Immediately they asked me what I wanted to drink, and then brought me chips and salsa. Rosa Mexicana 0, ¡Lotería! Grill 3 – suck it Rosa! I was handed 4 menus: the food, the 3-course meal, the specials, and the drinks. It was a bit over whelming handing me this encyclopedia of delights. I was here on a referral, thank you Jenny P., and I was told to have the giant tower of cheese aka the Chicharron de Queso. I asked the waiter what they were known for and he recommended the shrimp tacos and that’s just the type of meat I was looking for. Then I get the question… “Mild, medium or spicy?” Yea I’ll take my taco’s hot mister. As he walks away my spicy shoulder pads deflate. I will soon get owned.

That is such a loaded question because everybody’s gauge is different. Does anyone have a solution for this? I would love to hear it.

This all happened in about 1.3 minutes so in driving time I was on my third U-turn. Now Jenny built up this “Tower of Cheese” to be so huge that a small village could live inside of it. So ladies and gentlemen I bring you my first MEAT ME video.

Pretty suspenseful, I know. But at least you can see how they make it and it saves me 35 words explaining it. My carpal tunnel thanks you.

By this time the service is so quick and snappy I feel like I am saying thank you every 10 seconds. Do you like this? Some people don’t but for this place it is just the way I like it. Plus it makes me feel sexy!

So with my Cheese Tower I get 2 sides, salsa, guacamole, and some corn tortilla’s. I put them all together and take a bite… nothing. Not a whole bunch of flavor, but some. I got to make my second one and BANG there it is. The flavor is hiding in the middle of this cheese village. It's so good I have to have 2 more… Yeah and 4 more taco’s are coming. I am starting to understand that this was meant for more than one person.

By this time I am so sexy it feels like the chef is checking me out, or because I am taking pictures of my mouth while I eat. Either way I’m pretty sure it is because... I reek of sex appeal!

The score, Rosa Mexicano 0, !Lotería! Grill 10,000. Rosa has basically been reduced to the equivalent of a hot pocket. !Lotería! Grill has already won in my book – and am in now way trying to compare the two. But, Rosa’s has good food and everything else sucks (I have got Jenny P. to back me up on that one).

So it's nice to see that the little things can make an experience magical. Now the shrimp tacos arrive and they look like synchronized swimmers on a plate really to party in my mouth! Taco one, taco two, at this point they are delicious. A little more sauce than I am used to, but it is another one in the bag.

Now I am on my third taco and the shit is spicy. Yes… I referred to this amazing food as “the shit” and I still think it’s retarded good! You can see the sweat bullets on my face. My admiring chef approaches and asks, “Sir, is it to spicy?” I reply with my spicy shoulder pads completely gone (mouth full of food), “This-is-the-way-I-like-it!”

I am sure she could see the BS coming out of my ears. She even chuckled. How could you not laugh at this pathetic white dude? I am sweating at the counter taking pictures of myself. I would be in tears laughing. But, I am pretty sure it was once again the sexiness of the food that made me so damn approachable.

Not even this sexy beast could finish the fourth taco. At $35, $47 with tip (cause they were awesome) the bill was a little high but I didn’t mind, I felt I had earned it.

However I could not look at the half eaten taco as a defeat, because I was too SEXY for ME MEAT!

Ya! I said it!

Kisses,

Sean “Sexy” Rice

P.S. I found out later on that !Lotería! Grill makes their own tequila, and has incredible deserts. There you have it!  2 more reasons to go and check it out! Enjoy!

P.P.S Alright you people. I get over 200 of you guys visiting per day. And non of you have anything to say in the comment's section. Please... Please take the time to let me know what you like, and don't like. Even a simple "I like" will do the trick. I really wanna bring you guys things that your interested in, rather than me just going off on things that strike my fancy. Speak up damn it! Or places like iHop may be next. And... Thank You for taking the time out of your day to visit MEAT ME. I appreciate your feed back. Live long and eat meat!

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“The spices in those beans actually have medicinal purposes… they work as an anti-flatulent!” “Really… Is that soooooo.” - Rosa Mexicano

Yea! That lasted all the way to their front door. I couldn’t believe that a really nice restaurant would make such a claim, let alone, tell you about it. Ok… but for the sake of not spicing up a story, this was the waitresses’ claim, and she did say anti-gas. Whatever that’s worth, but to me its all the same.

It’s Saturday night, which means it’s date night with my better half. Since my work and this blog has been taking up a lot of my time, I agreed to not' turn the evening into a restaurant review. That too only lasted until the first appetizer arrived. She could see it in my eyes… it was killing me not saying anything about the service and not commenting on my thoughts about the food. I even ordered simple items on the menu, knowing I wasn’t looking for anything special other than our time together (I think I can add +10 brownie points to my score board for that).

I think it was getting harder for her not saying anything, knowing even she is getting really into this.

So we arrive at Rosa Mexicano on Sunset. It was her decision, I insisted she pick, and it came down to Rosco’s Chicken and Waffles or… Rosa Mexicano. Being that we were both dress up, Mexican it was. And from that moment forward the night got even more awkward.

We arrived, parked in the lower structure and elevated our selves to the restaurant. It had a beautiful entrance, lovely lighting, and loud thumping house music. Didn’t seem like it fit, but I’m never quick to judge. I like to get into it a bit, before I decide, if I like it or not.

“Yes, 2 please… No we don’t have reservations.”  Of course all those poshy places on Sunset can’t have someone just walk into their restaurant without making them feel like homeless off the street.  All the empty tables were booked so we were sat outside. Right under the VIP house music speaker section. We sat, I opened my menu, she worded something to me, I couldn't hear her, and at that point the waitress arrived. Surprise,  I asked to be moved to the EMPTY back section of the restaurant WHERE NO ONE WAS SEATED!!! (and it was quiet) I mean come on restaurant hostess… is it really that much more work for a server to walk 8 more feet to serve us. And why the hell would you not have servers for every section of a restaurant on the main Sunset Strip, Saturday night… at 8pm to be exact!  I worked restaurants for 5 years, I have a right to bitch.

So we get moved. Fantastic! We can now restart this awkward night. (buzzer sound) WRONG! I look over and the manager, and our lovely waitress, is yelling at each other for moving us.

So its safe to say, make reservations at this place, and no body gets hurt. But hey! We could hear each other and that’s all that mattered. For now…

Time to order… Our server informed us that they were known for their table-side guacamole service, their enchiladas and their butter fly red snapper. The miss’s had the beef enchilada and I have the chicken, we started with the guacamole. There was a big dilemma with the spiciness of the guacamole.  Should we go medium… we usually go spicy… they can add jalapenos on the side… but its really not that spicy when you order spicy… so screw it, MAKE THAT SHIT HOT! We’ll take it!

So the guacamole maker (I don’t know if these people have an official name, so no disrespect) came by and whipped us up some GUAC! He also added 2 sides of salsa and our custom jalapenos.  Ummm, it was nice and creamy guacamole. It had just the right amount of salt and lemon. But guess what… Not one God Damn ounce of spice. I mean nothing; the minerals in my ice water had more kick than this guacamole.  So we added the salsas and it turned out to still be pretty good.

At this point she looks at me and says, “Are you sure you don’t want to write about this place?”. I laughed, “Sure what else could possibly make this more interesting!”. With a slight turn of the head and boom… Across the way, some women is standing up running around panicking, because someone spilled red wine all over her nice Gucci bag. Good heavens how on earth could that happen. By the look on her face, you would of thought her husband was shot in the face by her server. Nope, just wine. But like my girly said, “If you can’t afford to fix it, you probably shouldn’t buy it.” Well said. She may have been implying that I am paying for dinner, and maybe desert, but nun the less I always have her back.

The food has arrived; at this point I am ready for anything. Her beef dish is in a dark sauce… mine a light green, sprinkled with cheese and cilantro. All accompanied by a bowl of black beans and rice. I take a bite, she takes a bite, and we looked at each other in disbelief. Holy shit, this stuff… is… AMAZING. I couldn’t believe what I had tasted. I had no idea how to even describe it. We had never had enchiladas this good or even flavored this way.

Its like all the weird shit that happened before, didn’t matter. Now… shit just got real! It was all about this masterpiece that came from the kitchen. The waitress stopped by an asked. “Is everything ok?’, I said “No, I need you to tell me what this is because my mouth is confused!”… She smiled and explained.

In her beef enchilada they use peppers, nuts and chocolate in the mole. “CHOCOLATE!!!” It was fuckin’ chocolate. I couldn’t f-in believe it. It was so, so, good. I had no idea. Mine was traditional green sauce with chihuahua cheese and grilled chicken. The beans were with tapas and queso fresco. With that super special medicinal… anti-gas… beans… Ok, whatever you say Jack! (I am still passing gas from that meal 8 hours later.) The rice, was a brown rice, seasoned with mustard which resulted in a yellow color. All in all, the food was quite good.  In a month or two I may want to go back again and try and be surprised by something else on the menu (sorry I didn’t have my camera so my photos do this beautiful food absolutely no justice).

After having consumed our individual art pieces we chatted about desert… And we chatted, and chatted. Should we have the deep-fried ice cream, should we go somewhere else, what was on the menu… Who knew. Our waitress, GONE! Never saw her again. I’d say we sat there for a good 20 minutes or so, (in a full room of people, mind you by this time, the tables were full) and nothing. Nada. Not even a peep. She had in fact magically disappeared! We had to ask a random server for our check. At this time I was reminded that we had also ordered Plátanos Fritos. Which I would have loved to have told you about, but WE NEVER GOT IT!!! So we paid and we left.  Really just out of frustration…

I feel restaurant owners have no idea how much bad service hurts them. It is 50% of the experience if not more. If your customers have to flip out just to get your good food, what’s it worth to them? Especially when it’s really pricy!

I lived next to Crazy Rock’n Sushi (which I can’t wait to 
do a write up on, one of my fav’s) and had been going there since the day they opened. I used to go there everyday. I did the math and I was spending about $1,000 a month on their food. Their sushi was always amazingly fresh, large portions, and tasty. But, I had to wait 45 minutes for a Bud Light. One day I slammed my empty bottle up on the sushi bar after the waiter (who was super busy) looked at me for the 8^th time, without my beer. I looked at the owner and said, “What the fuck do I have to do for a fucking beer? I come here everyday, I spend over $1,000.00 on your delicious food, I shouldn’t have to fight for it. Figure it out cause I’m not coming back for a week!”. I stormed out. James the owner and I were good friends, but he didn’t know this was the case because I never said anything.

I feel bad now. Tonight I should have told the manager, I said nothing and now no one will know that people may never get to taste their delicious food. I even tipped the server… screw them. How are they going to know that they fucked up if I leave them $10 tip!  I left the wrong message for both parties.

When I came back to the sushi restaurant a week later he had 2 more people serving on each shift, and a service button at each table.  It worked! Now I have to wait 20 to 30 minures just to get a seat at a table… but its worth it. Because I know once I sit down, I am going to enjoy amazing food. That’s what good service is all about.

I would love to give Rosa Mexicano a second chance. Something was way off about tonight, maybe with the whole city. We went to Pavilions to grab some cookies and ice cream, there were 3 cop cars out front and inside 10 broken bottles of wine and destroyed shelves. Felt bad for the guy who had to clean it up.

So remember. Speak up! Be Honest! And if the service sucks MEAT ME!!!


You can visit Rosa Mexicano locations on their website at
http://www.rosamexicano.com/Locations/LosAngelesCA/tabid/325/Default.aspx

Sean Rice

The bar at this place is amazing and would be lovely for a pre-night drink to get the evening started. Not to mention the ladies looked to be dressed at their best gentlemen (Wink)! Enjoy!

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